transfer window

Ok punters. I need to feel the love. Don’t tell me on twitter you like my site. Don’t claim to be my friend and promise to comment and then not comment thereby proving you are not my friend. Get involved and get commenting. The internet doesn’t always need to be about anonymity and self-loathing – it can be fun too!

We at coconutsandalcohol like to think of ourselves as a community, even if we (I) are (am) self-deluded and flying in the face of all the evidence.  No blogger is an island, they say, but sob sob sometimes it feels that way. I may have to go and prostitute myself to the nearest blog aggregating site if things carry on this way. Is that what you want? Is it?

So – this is my official January transfer window post. New posts may come and go, but this is the one you want to return to again and again to chew the fat and spread your rumours and spout your shit, basically.

At time of writing it’s looking like the following are possible moves:

Bentley to Newcastle.

Keane to Birmingham.

Beckham to us.

Frankly, I’d be happy with all of these, in decreasing order.

Bentley just needs to go. It’s not ever going to happen for him at Spurs, and I genuinely wish him well even if he has been a major disappointment.

I’m very sad about the story of Keane. There’s something Shakespearean about his tragedy. Something epic in his travails. Something depressing about his demise.

Mind you, I doubt MacBeth was on £60,000 a week, so goodbye Robbie, thanks for the memories. No – not those memories – the earlier ones. Yes, even your rubbish 15-degrees-out somersault archery celebration, you great big silly twat. See you at half time in 2016, maybe.

I’m a bit sad that he’s looking like going to Birmingham, a club I store in a file under my bed called “clubs I don’t like and don’t want Robbie Keane to join”. But I also want £7million, and if I can’t have that in a file under my bed, I might as well have it in the club coffers. The club coffers are too big to be stored under my bed, and despite my frequent use of the word ‘we’ in relation to Tottenham, my understanding is that I am legally forbidden access to it.

Beckham to Tottenham. Yeah, why not? Well – why? But, why not? These mini-loans have worked before – Larsson to Man Utd, and, umm,  they seemed to like him at Milan. I don’t doubt he brings something to the squad in terms of attitude, spirit, etc., and I don’t mind bringing him on with ten minutes to go when little Aaron needs a rest. And I admit that I quite like the idea of such an icon of world football and pants descending on lil’ ol’ us for a spell. I just can’t get that excited about it from a football point of view. If, however, you check out my other blog , you’ll see I’m very excited about it from a celebrity angle.

Ok – so. Does anyone have any thoughts on any transfer speculation? Who we’re linked with. Who we want. Who’s realistic. Who’s pie in the bloomin’ sky. Does anyone have any thoughts whatsoever?

Transfer window post OPEN.


29 responses to “transfer window

  1. I for one, don’t want Becks and hate his guts. I’m an American, so I guess my facination with that muppets died in 2002. I would prefer youth, myself.

    • Jayabe2,

      I agree that youth would be better. I actually struggle to have strong feelings about the Beckham thing. I like him as a bloke – not as a ‘media personality’, just that he seems like a decent fella underneath all the nonsense. I just don’t think it makes much difference from a footballing perspective.

      But his career seems to have been defined by overcoming doubters and he’s always been popular with players and fans wherever he’s been (not sure about America!), so I’m sure he wouldn’t have a negative effect. Unless, as you say, he comes instead rather than as well as young(er) talent.

      But listen – all this is mere whimsy. The overriding message is THANKS FOR POSTING, FEEL FREE TO STICK AROUND!

      • As a Yank, and a Spurs fan, I can say that most (most!) Americans view Becks with a combination of wry amusement and blazing indifference. Basically, he’s “That Guy Who Married That Chick From the Spice Girls.”

        That said, I’m of the “why the hell not” persuasion with this loan. Can’t hurt! Stick him in the middle and let him crank high passes towards Crouch all day!

        That said, I think I’d rather have Andy Carroll, gamble though it may be.

  2. Happy new year mr oog,

    Still enjoying your posts although I am not a hotspur (could think of the term for a spurs fan other than derogatory jewish things). Besides you appear to have an american soccer fan on here. He/she is unlikely to notice the difference.

    Hey – not derogatory to Jews but okay to diss the yanks. He’ll yeah.

    Anyway – I digress….

    Transfers – becks = nice guy but waste of time in terms of u bringing him in now. I would suggest that your main focus should be to bring in a reliable goalie. I am a jock and am biased but you could do a lot worse than Alan rough – sorry Alan mcgregor (wee joke there for our older viewers). Can’t think of any others…

  3. I wrote something to someone out there on the internet about this Beckham thing, so I’ll just copy and paste it here. No offence:

    “He’s a case of back up and off the bench at worst. The obvious place to pay him is on the right instead of Lennon when there’s either on injury or we just need to try something different.

    My preference, though, would be to play him in the middle next to Modric. One’s natural reaction would be that the pace would be too frenetic for old legs and that we’d lack a ball winner in the centre of the park. However, if you think about it, Spurs’s preference in the ’10/11 season is to play with Modric and Huddlestone neither of whom are known for their aggression, pace or ball winning. The trick is that they’re both excellent passers of the ball with the former better at short delivery and the latter with an eye for cross field. Think about it that way and Beckham makes a reasonable second for Huddlestone while recovering from the ankle operation. Our flying wingers could expect some excellent balls over the shoulder into perfect space and who better to stick one on Peter Crouch?

    Beyond that, his influence as someone who knows how to go out and win and close off games is going to be important. He’d also be able to teach some things to the younger members in our squad, not least of all Bale and Lennon.

    Throw into the mix a few more shirts sold, getting the brand out there worldwide and the general pleasure of seeing the great man in Tottenham colours and I’d say the answer was a tremendous yes. Spurs would be able to use him but, at the same time, miss him an it’d be no major loss. Plus there is word of some ridiculous loan fee. I wouldn’t mind but it’s not like the LA Gs would get much use out of him over the break. They should be paying s for keeping him fit.”

    So, that’s what I have to say about that. I read some terrible rumour about us swapping Bentley, Keane and Krancjar for Andy sodding Carroll but I don’t put much stock in that.

    Suarez’s name, which is Suarez incidentally, has popped up in the last few days with the figure of a reassuringly expensive £17m and there’s some young chap with the terrible label of “the new Van Basten” at FC Utrecht, I believe, who’s issued a come get me to the bigger clubs in the Prem – that includes us for the time being.

    Let’s see, what else has caught my attention…um…well, while I try to remember, Suarez sounds like an idea but I must confess to never once seeing him play despite his headlines at the World Cup. From what I gathered, his strike partner made more of an impact for the good in South Africa. All the same his record and unrelenting goal tally is impressive, even if in the free scoring Eredivese. With our best hopes looking like either beating Chelsea into 5th or winning the Champions League, we’re going to need to speculate somewhere.

    Pienaar is the other one. Not quite the boost we might be after but he’s a bugger to play against and I’ll try anything for £1.5m.

    That’s my thruppence.
    The Bagel.

  4. Far be it from me to disagree with the Bagel, BUT…

    Not interested in Beckham. Training with us? Great! May teach Lennon how to cross…maybe. Playing for us? No. Not for 7 games, no. Not for the rest of the season. A big, HUGE presence, that could well undermine the spirit and confidence/belief of those who have done all the work so far.

    I am alarmed we have not been linked – although paper talk means nuthin’ – with any kind of defender.

    A tasty striker is also what we want… but who?

    Can’t see 4th or 5th for us this year. Unless we win big cup. But really, even a year ending in one may not be enough for that.

    Andy Carroll? David Bentley had a great season at Blackburn, and he cost a lot…

    • Toby,

      Is defence really a priority in this transfer window?

      At centre back we have Kaboul, Dawson, Gallas and Bassong – that’s a pretty strong set even ignoring Woodgate (who is clearly not going to be in the premiership squad this year) and King (who we must assume isn’t going to be available). We even have Corluka and Huddlestone as emergency back-up. Yes, we keep getting injuries – but I think we already have the strength in depth in this position that has allowed us to get by.

      Full backs are slightly different. I’m not the world’s biggest Hutton fan but he’s improved drastically over the last couple of months. With Corluka, again, as cover if needed I’m content to wait until the summer to improve upon this position unless a really good option presents itself which is not the norm in January.

      At left back – perhaps this is the one bit of the back line we need to look at. I’ve forgotten where the Kyle who isn’t at Villa is, and to be honest I’ve forgotten where he plays – but I think our ‘cover’ in this position is Bale and thats not an option any more. If Benny gets injured, I’m not sure what we do . I’m generally pro-BAE but as I’ve said in the past, he’s still one of the weaker members of our first XI so in the short to medium term this IS a position to strengthen in.

  5. I was thinking over Christmas oog about your earnest pleas for posts and the (admittedly totally understandable) lack of blogs during the congested festive football schedule with the transfer window upon us – checking my email repeatedly each day – so was considering making my debut post to demand a blog on the transfer window. Call me Alanis Morrisette if I’m wrong, but I think this latest blog’s therefore sufficiently ironic to demand I now post on it instead.

    I think I read somewhere that we’ve got the biggest squad in the league, and it’s too big in my opinion, so I just want to see more out than in. Keane can go – no point paying that money when he’s not playing. Bently likewise. Niko’s unfortunate in doing nothing wrong but won’t get the games he deserves with VdV and Luka around and we’d get decent money for him. Not sure how I feel about the rumours surrounding Crouch – I quite like him, he does seem to work well with VdV and JD but he simply doesn’t score enough. For the first time in years I’d actually like Jenas to stay – recently been reminded of the potential he showed when winning Young Player of the Year. Of the potential targets, I’m right with you on Beckham – sell some shirts, bring some experience and work ethic, never want to see picked ahead of Lennon – but naturally feel our priorities are for a striker: Suarez sounds good but I’ve never seen him; Carrol would be a good fit – he’s capable of holding / assisting like Crouch but I reckon would get us more goals and there’s a 50:50 chance a move away from Newcastle may temper his off-field issues.

    Oh, and Benny always makes me nervous so would like a better left back.

    • G,

      Thanks for dropping by and keep the comments coming! I agree almost entirely (my reply to Toby covers the Benoit position).

      The one thing I’d say about the Beckham situation is that if we are concentrating on him and risking losing out on Pienaar (rumours are that Chelsea are interested) then the Beckham fixation is ‘a bad thing’. To me Pienaar would be a great Kranjcar upgrade. A squad member who could actually help turn our first XI into a first XII or XIII. He’d be genuine competition for Lennon and thats what you need for a player who’s form fluctuates so severely, whilst being able to play across the midfield in a way that Kranjcar can’t (or that Harry won’t allow, anyway). Whilst being better than Nico, I think.

  6. What would Jimbo do

    not very often that I agree with Oog, but I agree about Beckham. I’d like to see him in a Spurs shirt, but not as much as I would like to see Scarlett Johannsen in a Spurs shirt. He would be the Eidur Gudjohnsen of 2011, doing a decent job with 15 minutes to go. I’m sure he would be great to have about the place, but apart from that, he isn’t going to change much in 9 weeks. It seems so simple to me. We need a truely truely world class striker, who will score 25 goals and likes to play up top with VonDerFort just behind…….who is he?

  7. i’ll chuck in a tuppence..

    I’d love to see D Beck at the lane!!.. Fascinated to see what Harry can get out of him. Redknapp’s come out today after the Everton loss saying we lack leadership. Becks has that is spades, as well as Champs league and title-winning experience. It’s easy to see the negatives: of the media-circus/diversion of attention / focus away from our strong team spirit etc.. but frankly, if Harry sees benefits, then so do I! At best, I’d love to see some of the old Becks and in our team – what a midfield symbiosis it could be. Bring it on!

  8. I think I know what we need from this transfer window. We need Defoe to start banging them in. OK, he’s been injured and more recently suspended but he really needs to start firing. Pav or Crouch are never going to be prolific but do have the qualities to play a supporting role. Defoe needs to step up otherwise his position as our out and out striker is in doubt. Personally, I don’t think he is good enough for the very highest level but is there anyone out there that we can get that is better? If he hits top form then who knows what we can achieve but it’s a big if.

  9. Oh, and yes to Beckham. what harm can it do? He’s not going to start games but he may be an excellent player to bring on if things need changing. With Thud injured it’s a great replacement for a couple of months. He might even be able to get the ball into the end zone! Yay! Soccer!

  10. @Stuart – I’m an American and I live in North London (though in the Arsenal part of North London). We’re not quite as think as you might think! And a lot of us know a thing or two about football or “soccer” (which is an English, not American, word).

    As far as the transfer window goes, we’re also bringing in that Khumalo gentleman from South Africa. I know that’s a done deal, but I’ve not heard much about that in awhile. And I know very little about him. Hopefully he’s better than Sandro. Not that I’ve got anything against Sandro, but he doesn’t seem quite ready for the Premier League yet.

    I’ve no issue with Beckham at Spurs. Might sell a few more shirts and result in a goal or two from a set piece (if we’re lucky), which is always nice. We need cover at the back, though (in addition to Khumalo) and we still need a “real” striker. I don’t really care about winning the League. I just want to finish fourth. Spurs must qualify for Europe (the CL, of course) or we’ll lose talent and have trouble attracting any new talent. I feel actual momentum building (last night’s loss to Everton notwithstanding) and I’d like us to finally be able to capitalise on that.

    On the other hand, I’ve woken up today (in the US on holiday) to all sorts of bad news: Bale’s back injury, Levy wants to move us to Newham and the FA “denying” they are looking to replace Capello (which means, of course, that they are looking to replace Capello).

    Love the blog.

  11. @Stuart – I apologise. I apparently am thick. Or “think,” as it were. Red faced, too.

  12. Is Bale injured????

    So, we need to buy another Bale in the transfer window?
    Step up Krancjar. It’s not the same but whatever come after Bale is always going to be 2nd best.

  13. I’m happy to see Beckham at spurs. David ‘the new Beckham’ Bentley can be replaced by David ‘the old Beckham’ Beckham.

    We have been linked with Suarez which would be a good buy.

  14. Sorry no to Beckham because i can’t stand the guy.
    Thats a very good reason right there.
    Its going to be tough to bring in any quality this window.
    Won’t be surprised not to see ”New striker” anytime soon.

  15. Beckham:
    Thanks David but no thanks.
    Carroll, Surez, Doyle or Tom Cobley or AN Other; Applications on a postcard with references from your Mum if you like.
    Sell or even give away
    Crouch, Palacios. Have you got room under your bed for these two?

    Love the blog. Good sense with attitude. What’s not to like?

  16. Jimmy G2 thanks again for the kind words and I would recommend your blog to anyone else reading this.

    I don’t agree with you on Crouch or Palacios though. Crouch is obviously a frustrating player but if you look at how many goals he’s set up for Van der Vaart I still think he’s a great player to have in the squad. It feels a bit like the Heskey situation and I can see both sides, but, like Heskey, I’m sure his team-mates appreciate him.

    Palacios has clearly not lived up to expectations. I think it has to be remembered that the guy lost his brother in horrendous circumstances and if something like that isn’t a good explanation of a loss of form I don’t know what is. You can’t play a player out of sympathy though. I think he is still the best at doing a particular type of job for us though, and until we can get a replacement in he has to stay. Thats the problem with January – if you need to sell to buy, you don’t have enough time to do both.

    Nope, for me this transfer window need to be about getting rid of the deadwood – Keane, Bentley, possibly Kranjcar – and getting a striker in if one is around. Pienaar and I guess Beckham would be bonuses.

  17. Wilson Palacios's Mum

    Regarding Palacios

    I think he did live up to expectations but has recently been a bit pants. I hope we hold onto him. I will have the final say.

    He is the subject of one of the most unimaginative spurs chants I’ve ever heard.
    Wilson Palacios, Wilson Palacios, Wilson Palacios (repeat until fade)

  18. If we can come up with a better chant, will it make him play better?

    I’ll get my thinking cap on.

    Oh dear, Palacios rhymes with adios. Not a good start.


    a personal fave of mine

  20. Beckham unlikely to make a huge impact either way – though the possibility of him hitting Crouch’s bonce accurately all game long must be tempting. But perhaps best possible outcome is to have him train, pass on a few tips (though surely “look up before crossing the ball” is something Lennon could learn from others), and depart.

  21. ‘there will be a demo outside the main gates on Bill Nic way at 1pm on Sunday before the game. This demonstration has not been organised by the group WeAreN17 but members will be in attendance. It will be a peaceful protest to let the board know our feelings on the potential move to Stratford so please feel free to join and be heard.’


    David Lammy on Five Live today seeking legal advice against Spurs if they wanted to transport the Tottenham Hotspur name in any move to the Olympic Stadium. He does make a convincing argument… as do Chas and Dave for me.

  22. YOU HEARD IT HERE 37th

    Pienaar confirms he is signing for Tottenham.!/therealstevenpi

    Personally I’m pleased about this. He’s better than Kranjcar and he can play in any position across the midfield. Talking to an Everton supporting colleague he is gutted to see him go and thinks that he will fit right in at Tottenham. Apparently he is the kind of player who loves a give and go but “when you play with Phil Neville you tend to give and not get”.

    He also apparently plays with a “god is great” t-shirt under his shirt so like me he clearly grew up idolising Hoddle – whats not to like.

  23. This must mean the door for O’Hara (is he fit?) and Kranjcar. Pienaar always seems to be a busy player and likes to get stuck in. I guess Bale will need a rest every now and then. It’s not a bad deal for 2.5 mill. I’m sure we will recoup that in sales pretty quickly. Keane to Sunderland now that they are soon to be cash rich from the Bent sale?

  24. It’s over and it was all rather underwhelming. Which is fine by me. The chaps in the team have got us to where we are. Now it’s time to re-double our efforts and kick on to the finish.
    Andy Carroll 35 mill!!!! WTF!

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